What I learned in 2014: Six of Cups, operating from the heart, embracing the shadow self
It’s not that hard to unplug but it is absolutely necessary.
I don’t have to give everyone what they want all the time.
If I don’t give everyone everything they want all the time they won’t necessarily decide they don’t like me.
If I don’t give everyone everything they want all the time and they decide, because of that, they don’t like me, I should not give them anything — least of all my friendship.
Sometimes confrontation is necessary and even though it feels like shit at first that feeling dissipates and I’m left with more of what I want — my own voice being the stronger voice in my head.
What I have to say has worth in the world even if everyone I would like to think that is not interested.
You can always find other people who are interested in what you have to say in the world.
A thriving writing community is something for which I am eternally grateful.
Buying shit only makes you feel better while you’re buying it.
The flower blooms regardless of if anyone is watching.
Not only is it OK to embrace my shadow side, it is absolutely important that I do.
Moving from operating mostly with my head to operating mostly with my heart does not make me more vulnerable — in fact it makes me stronger.
My ear is a gift, not a given. (As in listening to people).
I get to take up my space.
It gets easier asking for what I want and refusing what I don’t want.
Manifesting is real.
My paranoia is usually wrong.
Some people will rise to the occasion.
Some people will understand.
Not drinking for a month is awesome.
I like free weights.
Shutting up and hearing nature is indelibly rewarding.
Three weeks away from home might be too long.
I really love the West.
You don’t have to accept what you suffered as a child to be the narrative that rules your life.
Magic is real.
What I was into as a kid is still pretty great. Music, writing, play, crystals, animals, nature, etc. My most valuable learning from tarot this year is that childlike play and doing what I was interested in as a child is a wonderful way to help quell the anxiety that comes from trying to wrap my left brain around change and moving forward. Six of Cups is my card of the year.
I get to call myself an artist.
Constant chatter is something from which I must remove myself, cast away my eyes.
My energy is worth conserving. That for which I’m conserving my energy is worth the effort it takes even if it means disappointing people sometimes.
My core desired feelings are: wholehearted, radiant, inspired, assurance, love, earthy grace.
Creativity, source energy, the heart, the quiet but remarkable voice inside will reach back to you when you reach in to them.
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It's me, Jennifer Bernice (rhymes with "Furnace": it was my Granny's name) Sutkowski
• More details about my writing here.