As I’m listening to Chani Nicholas’ solar eclipse course she asks, “What is leadership?” She goes on to ask: "how do you want to lead?" I’ve been thinking about this a lot. I just finished reading Danielle LaPorte’s White Hot Truth, in which she writes about being your own guru. Yes.
Then the other day I read three successive things talking about Johnny Depp, Joss Whedon and Louis C.K. treating women questionably at best. The guy I wanted, the guy I thought I could be, and the guy I aspired to learn from. Heroes, we call them. But could the universe tell me more strongly that we need to be our own hero? And as women, each others’ heroes as well (and that’s not just for cis-women). Because day after day gnarly ropes of bullshit shit keep getting exposed and it’s becoming clearer that we’re the ones to bring ourselves and each other clarity and strength.
“Are you leading with heart? Are you leading with anger?” Chani Nicholas says. “And talking about being collective. The old ways don’t work. The dinosaurs are having their last hurrah and we need a new way of doing leadership. And we are all leaders, right?…We are starting a new chapter or being course corrected or some things are beginning and some things are ending…this is a chance to reset ourselves.”
I’ve also been thinking about the Marie Kondo-ing of it all (The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing). How when you get rid of a lot of what no longer sparks joy (be it old furniture or defunct "heroes"), it allows you to see how much the things you actually love shine. And then you get to honor those things. And to me it’s not just about material things. It’s about relationships and where you put your time and energy. I got rid of a lot of furniture, for example, that was passed down to me from my sister and parents. It was great of them to help me furnish my house so we could recycle and reuse and I didn’t have to spend a bunch of money. But as I am getting older and stepping more fully into who this person is, I realized I not only get to make choices for myself, but it is imperative that I do. What do I want? Gotta make a lot of choices on the hero's journey. Some as silly as "do I want this chair?"
I spoke to a close friend the other day and she was talking about transforming the old mishegas into something useful. To dig into one’s old junk and trigger points and whatnot and, like an alchemical process you might use to smelt metal, create useful gold. Create something beautiful from which others will benefit. I love this. Big beautiful heroes and heroines wielding the golden scepters of our own old wounds. How does that sound? Pretty good to me.
So what do you think about leadership and being your own hero? I’m wishing you the best best best at bypassing the bullshit constructs of our society and feeling the power and clarity of your heart — because that, my friend, is what is real.
It's me, Jennifer Bernice (rhymes with "Furnace": it was my Granny's name) Sutkowski
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